


Gay For Pay

by DoctorV



Series: Archive: Doc's Old-Ass Fake News Fic (Daily Show, Colbert Report, etc.) [11]
Category: Fake News FPF, The Colbert Report, The Daily Show
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Denial, Doing Porn, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Jon Just Wants His Boyfriend To Stop Pretending He's Straight, M/M, Secret Identity, Stephen Is Bad At Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-16
Updated: 2018-03-16
Packaged: 2019-04-01 00:22:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13986456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoctorV/pseuds/DoctorV
Summary: Arguing over what counts as "gay".





	Gay For Pay

**Author's Note:**

> Archiving some old old OLD fanfic of mine. This was originally posted to LiveJournal 04/15/2009, with the author's note:  
> "Prompt was "Some sort of rentboy fic? Roleplay or AU." (This is actually a scene from a full-length fics I'm trying not to write. ...I am failing massively so far.)"
> 
> The full-length fic was never completed, sadly.  
> This is an AU where Jon and "Stephen" hook up while Jon's still doing stand-up and "Stephen" is doing gay porn and drugs under the name "Tyrone Hunnibi". This is also the name Jon knows him as, because "Stephen" is Bad At Honesty.

"It's really not fair that you get to make me question _my_ sexuality and still be in denial yourself," Jon says irritably.

 

"But I'm _not_ gay, Jon," Stephen insists.

 

"And what, you just couldn't make it in _straight_ porn?"

 

Stephen glares at him. "It's _gay_ for _pay_ , Jon. Don't read too much into it."

 

"Don't read—Tyrone, you have _sex_ with _men_!" Jon exclaims in disbelief, waving an arm. "How is that _not_ gay?"

 

"For. _Pay_."

 

"Oh _excuse_ me for not knowing all the terminology, I'm not as well-versed with the culture as _you_. 'Cause see until I _met_ you I thought I was _straight_."

 

"It's okay for _you_ to be gay, Jon!" Stephen snaps. "You're a wishy-washy, anti-establishment, tree-hugging _liberal_."

 

"' _Liberal_ ' isn't a euphemism for ' _gay_ '!" Jon shouts. "And if you're not gay, what the hell do you call it when I'm fucking you into the mattress until you scream my name? Huh?! Because I'm sure as hell not _paying_ you, and I _like_ to think you're not tweaked outta your mind _every_ time we do it!"

 

Stephen recoils as if struck, eyes widening.

 

"What-What do you _call_ that?" Jon demands, a helpless quality entering his voice. "Because it —It sounds pretty gay to _me_."

 

"A _mistake_ ," Stephen croaks, mind whirling. He's _not_ gay. He _can't_ be. No matter how much he loves feeling Jon's hands on him, his lips, his shy smile, his laugh, the way he just _accepts_ Stephen without making any demands that he _be_ or _do_... _anything —_Stephen T. Colbert is _not gay_! "It was a _mistake_!"

 

Jon stares at him, hurt flooding his features, and Stephen just can't take it. Shoving past him, ignoring the man's pleading shout of "Ty!" Stephen slams out of the apartment and down the stairs.

 

His body is screaming for a fix and if it means he doesn't have to think about Jon and the look on Jon's face and all the _feelings_ Jon makes him feel, then Stephen can't think of any reason not to. He doesn't have anything with him but the clothes on his back, and his wallet is almost empty, but his feet know the way to Donnie's and the man always has a part for Tyrone. A part Stephen can bury himself in, with the fire in his veins and humming of his skin and pleasure soaking his brain and taking away all the thoughts he doesn't want to think.

 

Wrapping himself in his resolve, Stephen leaves Jon behind as he heads for Donnie's office, pulling on Tyrone's coy and carefree flirtiness to keep his feet moving.


End file.
